Marriage jokes Jokes Funny Marriage jokes Jokes

Aardvark - Accountant - Answer me this - Ant - Apple - Aviation - Baby - Banana - Bar jokes, beer, booze! Barbie doll - Bath - Beauty - Bed - Bicycle - Biologist - Bird - Birthday - Blind - Blonde - Book title - Brother and sister - Burger - Bus - Business - Cannibal - Car and train - Cat - Children - Christmas - Clinton - College - Computer - Cow - Cowboy - Criminal - Dance - Dead and dying - Dentist - Dinosaur - Dirty - Divorce - Doctor and nurse - Dog - Easter - Elephant - E-mail - Email joke to a friend! Ethnic - Face - Farmer - Firefighter - Fishing - Food - Frog - Funny - 50 best - Ghost - Gorilla - Hair and bald - Halloween - Heaven & hell - History - Horse - Humor - Hunting - Idiot and fool - Insect - Internet - Journalist - Judge - King Kong - Knock Knock - Lawyer - Letter - Lotto - Marriage - Men - Mental health - Military - Money - Monster - Mouse - Movie and TV - Music - Old age - Parent - Pig - Police - Political - Rabbit - Random joke day Religious - Restaurant - Salesmen - School - Snake - Snowman - Space - Spelling - Sport - Teeth - Telephone - Time - Travel & tourist - Vampire - Various animal - Waiter - Weather - Witch - Women - Yo momma - Zodiac - Zoo jokes

The Yuppie showered a Yuppette with gifts from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
The Yuppie showered a Yuppette with gifts for over a month. He took her to fancy restaurants and expensive resorts. Finally, he proposed, "Bernie, if you will marry me, I have enough money to provide you with anything your little heart desires." "Sorry John." she replied. "I'm not ready to settle down yet. And besides, you can't buy my love, but if the price is right, I might see my way clear to rent you some."

The newlyweds arrived at the front desk from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
The newlyweds arrived at the front desk of the posh ocean-side resort in Hilton Head, South Carolina, looking all fresh, and eager to enjoy their two week vacation/honeymoon. The stunning blonde at the front desk smiled and said, "Well, hi Jimmy, how ya been lover ? Long time no see." A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached their room. Once inside, the piqued bride demanded: "And just who was THAT woman ?!?!?" The groom wiped his brow and said, "Just relax honey. Please ! I'm going to have enuff trouble explaining you to her."

My wife and I were watching some from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
My wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife hired a private detective to follow her husband and see if he were in fact "cheating" on her. I asked my wife if she would ever do that. She said, "Well not so much to find out who the other woman was, but to see if I could find out what she saw in ya."

A friend of mine told me he from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A friend of mine told me he had signed up with one of these on-line dating services. I asked him the other day if he had had any luck and he said he'd quit -- seems they'd matched him up with his wife.

A man comes home early from work from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A man comes home early from work and finds his wife and his best friend in bed. The man throws up his hands in disbelief and says, "My God Pete !!! I more-or-less 'have to', but YOU ???"

Ive never been much on fashion but from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
I've never been much on fashion, but got quite a few compliments on a new sports jacket I wore to work one day. My secretary asked me where I got it and I told her that it was a surprise from my wife. I went home early yesterday, and there it was, on the back of a kitchen chair.

Mrs Culpepper was almost in tears Oh from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
Mrs. Culpepper was almost in tears. "Oh Marie," she said to her maid, "I have reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary." "I don't believe it for one minute !" Marie snapped."You're just saying that to make me jealous !!!"

The sailor came home from a secret from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. "Was it my friend Sam", he demanded. "No !" his weeping wife replied. "Was it my friend Jim then?" he asked. "NO !!!" she said even more upset. "Well which one of my no good friends did this then?" he asked. "Don't you think I have any friends of my own?" she snapped.

If your wife comes out of the from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
If your wife comes out of the kitchen to whine at you, what have you usually done wrong? Made her chain too long.

An Illinois man who left the snowfilled from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
An Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly woman whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: DEAREST WIFE: JUST GOT CHECKED IN. EVERYTHING PREPARED FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW. YOUR LOVING HUSBAND P.S. SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE

A guy is dating three women and from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A guy is dating three women and can't decide which one to marry. He gives each $1,000 to see how well they can manage money. The first one spends $800 and puts $200 in the bank. The second one spends $200 and puts $800 in the bank. The third one puts the whole $1,000 in the bank. Which one does he end up marrying? The most beautiful one..

After she woke up a woman told from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?" "You'll know tonight." he said. That evening, the man came home with a package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it - to find a book entitled "The meaning of dreams"

Playboy is coming out with a new from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
Playboy is coming out with a new magazine for men who are married. Every month the centerfold is the exact same woman.

A man comes home and hears hard from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A man comes home and hears hard breathing female noises from inside the aprtment, walks inside to find his wife on the floor of the living room naked. Wife yells, "help, help, I am having a heart attack", the husband runs in the other room to call the doctor when one of his kids run up to him and says "daddy, daddy, there is a naked man in the closet", husband opens the closet door and sees his friend Bob. He yells at Bob, "Bob, god damn it, my wife is having a heart attack and here you are trying to scare the kids"!!!

A man calls his family doctorman Doctor from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A man calls his family doctor: man: Doctor, for the last week my wife has thought that she was a rabbit. doctor: Ok, bring her in and I'll try to help. man: Fine, but whatever you do, don't cure her.

Two men are having an awfully slow from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
Two men are having an awfully slow round of golf because the two ladies in front of them managed to get into every sand trap, lake, and rough on the course, and they didn't bother to wave the men on through, which is proper golf etiquette. After two hours of waiting and waiting, one man said, "I think I'll walk up there and ask those gals to let us play through." He walked out to the fairway, got halfway to the ladies, stopped, turned around and came back, explaining, "I can't do it. One of those women is my wife and the other is my mistress. Maybe you'd better go talk to them." The second man walked toward the ladies, go halfway there and, just as his partner had done, stopped, turned around and walked back. He smiled sheepishly and said, "Small World!"

Wife Do you think of me when from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
Wife: "Do you think of me when you're away darling?" Husband: "Yes honey, I always bare you in mind."

A man brings his wife a glass from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A man brings his wife a glass of water and two aspirins. She looks surprised and says, I don't have a headache!" He says, "Aha!"

You and your husband dont seem to from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
"You and your husband don't seem to have an awful lot in common," said the new tenant's neighbor. "Why on earth did you get married?" "I suppose it was the old business of 'opposites attract'," was the reply. "He wasn't pregnant and I was."

A wife was berating her husband He from Flashcomment Marriage jokes Jokes
A wife was berating her husband. He motioned for her to quiet down saying, "Don't unleash the beast in me." The wife snickered and replied, "Unlike a lot of women, 'dear', I'm not the least bit afraid of a mouse."